On Petting Puppies and Dealing with Bastards
by Crazy PurpleSage
Summary: What can you do again when you turn 18? Naruto grinned. He hadn't told any of his friends about his mission yet, nor about the bastard upon whom the mission semi-revolved. "You can buy cigarettes, rent a dune buggy, and pet puppies at the pet store."


_Summary__: _What can you do again when you turn 18? Naruto grinned. He hadn't told any of his friends about his mission yet, nor about the bastard upon whom the mission _semi_-revolved. "You can buy cigarettes, rent a dune buggy, and pet puppies at the pet store."

_Dedication__: _To my younger sister, who just turned 18 on May 29th. Her_ odd _comment about being able to pet puppies at the local pet store now without a guardian is what gave me the idea to write this. Ever the interesting one! ;)

_Unbeta'd _

_Disclaimer__: _I do not own NARUTO nor the rights to Kishimoto's characters

_Now, please enjoy!_

_On Petting Puppies and Dealing with Bastards _

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Today was a good day. Today was Sunday. The air was hot and humid and mosquitoes were out dining on unsuspecting guests, but everyone was happy. At least that much was clear from the laughing, smiling faces that ran around the outdoor picnic table, all here for one reason: celebrating Naruto's birthday, which was only three days away.

With no family to speak of – at least not any blood relations; today, Naruto decided he was going all out as though it was actually October 10th. For one, his friends had school or work, or both, on the actual day; and for another, Naruto himself not only had both school and work, but he also had a mission to complete.

And no, it wasn't to get his driver's permit, buy cigarettes, or get alcohol. In fact, it was something much cooler and more fun that shouldn't have an age limit in the first place.

"So Naruto, how old are you turning, again?" Ten Ten looked down the table to ask.

They were midway through their meals of hamburgers and hotdogs, sitting outside under the big table umbrella at Sakura's house. She had graciously offered to host Naruto's party at her place, whereupon her parents had offered to provide and cook all the food. As Naruto had originally been planning on a small get-together at the local diner where he worked, he was currently falling over himself with gratitude, running around this way and that to help wherever he could. He had only just sat down for the first time that day, upon a direct command from Sakura's mother, who told him to relax and enjoy himself or else, when Ten Ten asked.

"18," he answered with an award-winning smile and promptly dug into his hotdog with extra mustard and relish.

His friends were a variety of ages from as _old_ as Tsunade Senju – his boss, landlady, and personal mother hen, who had insisted on coming to chaperone and keep an eye on Naruto – to his fellow classmates in high school and college, respectively. Then, of course, there were the younger kids: Konohamaru, Udon, and Moegi, who liked to follow Naruto around like his own personal shadow every chance they got ever since Naruto was 12 and they were 6. But other than them, Naruto was the youngest of the group. And depending on whom you were asking, the youngest was subject to all and every kind of teasing. Or maybe that was just something Naruto brought about in his own unique way; always attracted teasing. He liked to think the former.

In any case, for these reasons, he rather enjoyed hanging out with Konohamaru and the gang when he could. At least they showed him the respect he deserved. His other friends, on the other hand, liked to rub his young age in his face from time to time, just for the fun of it. Like now.

And right on cue, Kiba chimed in.

"That's right," the wild-looking brunet said with a put-upon air of sudden realization. Kiba was almost two years older than Naruto; but truthfully, you wouldn't know it by the way they acted together.

Kiba continued, "What can you do again at 18? It was so long ago I just can't remember."

Instead of being deterred and thinking of a good retort, which was usually related to Kiba's physical appearance, relations to, or close connections with dogs, Naruto just grinned. He hadn't told anyone about his mission yet, nor about the bastard upon whom the whole mission _semi-_revolved around.

"Buy cigarettes, rent a dune buggy, and pet puppies at the pet store."

"And porn," Kiba added in, bulldozing on from the first thing Naruto had listed.

The rest of the table, on the other hand, were giving him weird looks that ranged from tentatively amused to full blown questioning of his sanity. At Sakura's unadulterated laughter, Kiba stopped and looked back at Naruto with a what-the-heck face. But he wasn't left clueless for long when Konohamaru blurted out, "_Puppies, _boss!"

"What about puppies?" Kiba's face screwed up even further in confusion. "Were talking about cigarettes and porn!"

"Naruto wants to pet puppies for his birthday," Ino supplied.

"Can't you do that, like, _any _time?" Lee asked, confusion written all over his face; his big, bushy eyebrows were scrunched so close together that Naruto swore it look like he was sporting a unibrow.

Only Tsunade had a knowing look on her face. After all, her husband owned the pet store in question right across the street from her diner.

"Yeah," Naruto nodded like it was the most obvious thing in the world, and took a huge bite out of his second hotdog. "You need to be 18 years or older to play with the puppies, unless with a guardian. It says so on the door, the counter, and the puppy playpen." He knew this because the bastard of an employee who was there _all day, every day_ liked to shove it in Naruto's face every time Naruto came in – which was basically every day. He also happened to be the same bastard who showed up minutes before _Naruto's _interview with Jiraiya for a position at the pet store and ended up taking _Naruto's _job.

Jiraiya had called it good, quick business, but Naruto had called it being lazy and wanting to return to one's side work –which in Jiraiya's case, consisted of writing _Icha Icha _porn novels – as soon as possible. So stupid _Sasuke Uchiha _got Naruto's job and stupid _Sasuke Uchiha _got to pick up and pet the puppies whenever he wanted. Usually he did so in front of Naruto, even with a disgusted look on his face for having to touch what he called 'dirty fur' and 'tick-infested fleabags'.

But not anymore.

Naruto was turning 18 now, so he could go and play with the puppies whenever he liked now, too! And there was nothing stupid _Sasuke Uchiha _could do about it.

His friends had left it at that as soon as they saw the crazed look in Naruto's eyes – it only spelt trouble for the rest of them if they were to ask, so they wrote this whole puppy-petting thing off as another one of his little quirks – and proceeded to just enjoy themselves for the rest of the day.

∞_Ο∞_

In the week following, Naruto didn't go into the pet store at all on Monday and Tuesday; wanting to make more of a dramatic entrance on Wednesday.

He had a plan.

Naruto's shift ended at 7:00 and unlike most pet stores, this one stayed open 'til 8. That meant that Naruto had a whole hour to pet, cuddle, and pick up puppies to his heart's content.

The door jingled as he stepped inside the small shop, which looked completely devoid of human life at the moment. Until…

"Back again for more torture Tantalus?"

The bastard stepped out from behind the bird feed aisle in all his bastard glory, with his holier-than-thou smirk, fitting black polo shirt, employee regulated khakis, and duck-butt styled hairdo. He sauntered towards Naruto, stopping a foot away. With this distance he maintained a very fine line between friendly familiarity and employee attentiveness, letting Naruto know he would be keeping an eye on him the entire time he was in the store, like he did every day; just in case Naruto tried any funny business.

And yes, Naruto was disappointed to say he had tried every trick under the sun to escape Sasuke's watchful coal black eyes and touch just one puppy. But Sasuke bastard was always one step ahead of him.

But not this time.

"Hardly _Hephaestus_," Naruto droned sarcastically, sticking his tongue out at Sasuke. He was such a jerk! Always rubbing it in Naruto's face every chance he got. He couldn't leave Naruto alone for one freakin' second.

"Actually, I'm here to pet the puppies." That was good: calm, but forceful; defiant.

"Oh," Sasuke stuck his hands in his pockets and foisted a pout on his pale, usually indifferent face, "And here I thought you always came to see me. Or," he paused for a few seconds to allow the comment to really sink in and make sure he had Naruto's attention. But seeing as no one else was in the store and Naruto couldn't look away even if he tried – his rival was speaking, which meant that Naruto had to pay attention to be able to quickly figure out what witty retort to throw back at him – Sasuke had his full attention anyway.

"Or maybe you finally managed to learn to read in the past few days you've been gone." And again, as he did every time Naruto came in, Sasuke tilted his head lazily to the sign on the glass walls surrounding the adorable, cuddly, fluffy, sweet, and playful little pups: _Must be 18 years or older to handle puppies alone, unless accompanied by an adult or guardian_.

"Still alone again, and how old are you? 15? 16?"

Naruto puffed out his chest, stood to his full height of 5'7, marched straight up to the stupid bastard _Sasuke Uchiha, _and said, "I'm 18 asshole, and I'm going to pet those puppies. Now."

With that, he sidestepped Sasuke and went right up to the playpen where at least 10 puppies of all different shapes, sizes, and colours were romping around.

Immediately, he reached over the glass and picked up a black Yorkshire terrier that looked like it was just waiting to be cuddled.

"Aren't you so cute," Naruto cooed as he raised her up under the armpits until they were face to face. He nuzzled his nose against her tiny black wet one and then gathered her into his arms so he could stroke a hand along her back. "You know what you look like? A Rea! I'm going to call you Rea." He scratched one hand behind her floppy ears, listening to her yip excitedly in response, and cradled her against his chest.

He was so caught up in the first glorious moment that he failed to notice one particular brand of bastard sneak up behind him.

"Since when?"

Naruto jumped, clutching little Rea to his chest as he spun around, his heart pounding against his rib cage as he did so.

"Geeze jerk! Give a guy a warning, why don't ya? Sore loser," he muttered the last part to himself. He won and there was nothing stupid _Sasuke Uchiha_ could do about it now! Ha!

But Sasuke just stared at him unblinkingly.

"What?" Naruto asked, starting to feel more than just a little creeped out at the way Sasuke was staring. He took a step backwards and bumped into the glass case.

Sasuke took a step forward.

"Since when?" Sasuke said a bit more forcefully, eyes blazing at being forced to repeat himself.

"Since when _what_?" Naruto clutched at Rea wondering if Sasuke really did kick puppies in his spare time and if using Rea as a shield would really be all that effective.

Sasuke heaved an irritated sigh and leaned even closer to Naruto, making Naruto shut his mouth and take short, staggered breaths through his nose. He hadn't brushed his teeth since this morning and had just eaten a meatloaf sub an hour ago for dinner, courtesy of his friend, the chef, Chouji. But he certainly hadn't foreseen someone coming up so close as to smell his breath any time tonight. Why was Sasuke this close?

"Since when have you been 18?"

Naruto stuck his tongue out to lick his lips. Was it getting hot in here or was it just him? He looked down and saw that Rea was falling asleep in his arms contentedly. It must be her bed time. Lucky thing; able to just fall asleep on command and not have to deal with personal-space-invading-creepy bastards.

"Since today," he answered. "Why?" Naruto narrowed his eyes suspiciously and frowned at Sasuke. What did it matter? He could pet the puppies and handle them on his own legally now, so Sasuke could just leave him alone and get back to work without having to bother with watching Naruto for an hour like usual. It wasn't like he didn't know he could trust Naruto not to steal one or vandalize the store while his back was turned. So why was he still here?

"Hn. Interesting." Sasuke smirked, an inch from Naruto's face, and then abruptly leaned back, turned around, and started walking away.

_Tap. Tap. Tap._

Naruto listened to the sound of Sasuke's sneakers retreating softly across the floor. The lights flickered up ahead and little Rea stirred in Naruto's arms, probably in response to the occasional barks and rustling noise of the puppies below. But Naruto was frozen; inwardly spluttering, caught amoung confused, angry, and…disappointed?

What. The. Heck. Was that?

He spun around and gently placed Rea back in the pen with her friends, careful not to wake her, and then ran after the retreating black polo back.

"Yo, jerk!" He grabbed hold of Sasuke's shoulder and pushed him round to face him again. "What do you mean, 'interesting'?"

Sasuke, who didn't look at all surprised by Naruto's sudden forcefulness, simply stuck his hands in his pockets and dropped his shoulders into a more relaxed pose. In fact, he looked almost…_pleased_ that Naruto had stopped him.

"I mean," Sasuke leaned down with a smirk, now even closer than before – mere centimeters from Naruto's face, "is that I didn't know you were so close to being _legal_…now."

Another second passed between them before Sasuke closed the tiny gap between their lips in a chaste kiss.

Naruto froze. He could say that he hadn't been expecting that, but at the moment his thoughts were all put on hold as he concentrated solely on the feeling of Sasuke's soft lips against his own. And just as Naruto began to press back, Sasuke pulled away and gave a small but genuine smile.

"In that case," Sasuke continued from before, shuffling his heels back as he spoke, "I hope you'll be around here a lot more often to _legally _have some _fun_." Turning around with that familiar smirk and heading to the back, behind the toy section, Sasuke disappeared without another word, most likely to let Naruto have his time with the puppies.

Or so Naruto assumed in his semi state of shock.

Sasuke…kissed him? Bastard _Sasuke Uchiha_ had just kissed him! And had said…wait!

How dare he think Naruto was only 15! He had a much manlier, more mature appearance than a puny 15 year old! Naruto had a fit physique and muscles and…oh, who was he kidding? But apparently none of that really mattered because that was just…just…

Naruto looked at the puppies, his face scrunched up in contemplation, watching them frolic around and stumble over each other without a care; then he looked over at the shelf Sasuke had disappeared behind.

Mission number one: Pet the puppies: _Complete_.

Next mission: Melt the biting slab of ice that was one bastard named Sasuke Uchiha: _Work in Progress_.

He followed after Sasuke to begin doing just that.

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終わり

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_Any thoughts you'd like to share? Discuss? Random stuff? Who saw the new Pirates movie ! I think the mermaid parts were by far my favourite! ^0^ Who will be my jolly sailor bold? _


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